Fear. It can make us hesitant to take chances, take risks, and live life to the fullest. It's as if a giant barrier had been built around us and we can no longer reach out and grab the things that we truly want and desire. Fear of rejection is a natural feeling that we all experience from time to time, but when it starts to negatively affect our lives, we need to take action to help conquer it.
Let's begin by looking at what rejection actually is, where it comes from, and how it affects our lives.
Why do we fear rejection?
Fear of rejection can be traced back to the thinking of two philosophers, Plato and Aristotle. These two great thinkers set the foundation for a lot of the thinking that is still used today. They both believed that the worst thing that could happen to a person is to be ridiculed and rejected by one's peers.
What we are afraid of depends on who we are and our own unique history. It also depends on what's happening in the present. A real or perceived threat in the present may trigger the same underlying mechanism. On top of that, each person will have a unique set of fears based on their individual past, personality, and experiences.
Did you know there are 5 core fears that are hardwired into the psyche of humans? They are:
Abandonment, or loss of love
Loss of identity
Loss of meaning
Loss of purpose, or of the chance to express oneself
Loss of life, or fear of death, including fear of sickness or pain
Rejection in selling is usually attributed to the first core fear because we are emotionally connected to, and passionate about, what we do.
How do we overcome the fear of rejection?
There are three simple steps you can use to manage your fears.
Identify what you're actually afraid of. In selling, it's rarely a case of being afraid of rejection, but rather what that rejection represents and the lack of control you have in the outcome. You all know this familiar thought spiral: a customer rejects your offering and you lose the sale. Not getting the sale might mean not hitting your targets this month. Missing your targets means losing commission, missing out on bonuses, and falling short on quarterly and yearly targets. It also means having to work harder to make up for the missing revenue. Ask yourself a few clarifying questions to help identify the core of your fear:
Why is that upsetting to you?
What are you afraid will happen next?
What are you afraid you will miss or lose?
Action. What was the original goal that drove you to this point? Do you have it up on your wall or somewhere you can see it when you need to? Take a moment to remind yourself why you're going through this bullshit in the first place and what the end game looks like. Now that you have refocused, it's time for an action plan that will mitigate the 3 questions you answered in the last step. Need more in the pipeline to offset a lower closing ratio? Get it done. Need to refine your lead list with a more accurate Ideal Customer Profile? Make it happen. Whatever you do, don't fall into the trap of avoiding the pain. Face it head on like a warrior should.
Remember that fear is 100% normal. Fear is a primal reaction to threats against our physical, emotional, and psychological well being. It's not about stopping fear, it's about knowing how to work with it, reframe it, and turn it into a powerful catalyst for action.
Now, practice these steps and tell those fears to pound sand.
No comments:
Post a Comment